


Everything He Should Never Be

by TimmyJaybird



Series: 100 Themes Challenge [29]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU
Genre: Blow Jobs, Fluff, FtM Dick, Love Confessions, M/M, Shower Sex, Trans Character, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-21
Updated: 2017-03-21
Packaged: 2018-10-05 22:12:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10318127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TimmyJaybird/pseuds/TimmyJaybird
Summary: Slade comes home early from a job, and a simply "I missed you" is enough to make Dick rethink everything they are- and whatever he had first thought they would be.





	

**Author's Note:**

> The theme was "frost"! Voted on by my Twitter followers, actually.

Dick pressed his hand to the window, his arm just poking out from the blanket he had draped around his shoulders. There was a layer of frost on it, from the freezing outside. One of the coldest nights in Gotham history, they were saying. The streets were mostly empty, but he felt like he should be out there. He knew Bruce’s patrol tonight was less on the lookout for trouble makers and more on the lookout for anyone needing a place to get out of the cold for the night.

 

But Bruce had insisted everyone stay indoors if they could. Had told Dick he’d take care of it, Tim would keep things running smoothly from the cave, he’d keep Damian  _ in _ the Batmobile. Dick had been going nonstop the past week, anyway.

 

Which is what he did when he had an empty apartment to come back to.

 

He sighed, turning away from the window and heading back for the couch. It was piled with blankets that he nestled into, the glow of the TV his only light. His phone was balanced on a pillow, quiet. No word from Slade for the past day- and Dick knew it didn’t mean he wasn’t  _ fine _ , just busy. He didn’t plan to be back for a few days, anyway.

 

Dick curled up more, tugging his blanket tighter around him and trying to focus on the cooking show he’d left the television on. He wondered if Jason had stayed in. Would he be home if he called? Would he watch this show with Lian curled up on his lap, with Roy working away in the workshop, and talk about it with Dick? He was seriously contemplating it, was even grabbing his phone, when he heard the lock turning and clicking on their window, facing the fire escape.

 

Dick was up when it was jerked up, which would have taken  _ strength _ as he was sure it was frozen shut. But the tension that had instantly welled up in him dissipated when a familiar body slid in, landing firmly on the floor. Slade, in full gear, mask still on even, towering in his apartment like he had been summoned straight from Dick’s lonely thoughts.

 

Dick rushed over, phone dropped on the couch, blanket still around his shoulders. “You’re home!” he said, moving to hug Slade, but the moment his arms touched his suit he jerked back, the material feeling like ice. “And freezing,” Dick pointed out. Slade shook his head, turning to shut and lock the window, so the heat couldn’t escape. When he turned back around he reached up, scrunching his mask up over his nose, so he could speak clearly.

 

“Everything’s freezing out there,” he said, and Dick didn’t argue that. But he stepped closer, reached up and just managed to keep his blanket on his shoulders as he ran his hands up Slade’s chest, towards his shoulders.

 

“Let’s get you outta this cold thing,” Dick said, toying with a holster strapped across his chest. “Warm you up. Shower maybe?” Slade didn’t argue, stepping away from the window and further into their warm apartment. Dick turned to head back for the couch, leaving his blanket there and picking up his phone, just to check in on everyone, as Slade began dismantling his suit and weapons, leaving things in a heap on their coffee table. “I thought you weren’t coming home for days.”

 

“Missed you,” Slade admitted, and Dick jerked his head up, feeling his chest go a little tight. It was admitted so casually, Slade didn’t even pause the work he was doing, stooped over, cold fingers working at his thigh holster. Even if they were  _ living together _ , hearing that sort of casual affection was still almost strange. Maybe because once, Dick had been so sure it would never happen. Not with this man.

 

Slade straightened up, tugged his gloves off, tossed them in the heap. Then he finally went for his mask, working it open from the back, so it parted around his ponytail. It joined everything else, and Dick dared to glance up, to just  _ stare _ for a moment, because god- Slade was so attractive to him it made his insides just hurt.

 

“Grayson,” Slade chided, reaching back to work his hair free of the ponytail. “You’re staring.”

 

Dick swallowed thickly, fidgeting his phone between his hands. “Sorry,” he mumbled, cursing himself because he sounded like a damn teenager. He was well over that stage of his life. He was an  _ adult _ , he didn’t get lovesick and giddy and full of butterflies-

 

Oh who was he kidding?

 

“I’m going to go… start the shower.” Dick dropped his phone on the couch again, moving around the coffee table and down the hallway, towards the bathroom. He flicked the light on, heading to the shower and pulling the door open. He reached in, started the water, cranking up the heat and then closing the door. He leaned against it, swiped his hands back through his hair.

 

Slade had come early. For him. Had said he’d  _ missed him _ , like it was enough of a reason for anything. And it… Dick hadn’t…

 

Dick hadn’t been  _ braced _ for that.

 

“Grayson?”

 

“Still in here!” Dick called towards the voice. He pushed off the shower, taking a deep breath, trying to keep himself composed. Slade appeared in the doorway, stripped of his suit completely and in his boxer briefs like it was completely normal- which it  _ was _ . That was a typical morning sight that Dick was rather fond of. “Started the water for you.”

 

Slade smiled. He walked over, reached up and got his hand in Dick’s hair, tugging him in enough so he could kiss his temple. Dick felt heat rising in his cheeks, bit at his lip and fought the urge to melt right against Slade. He wasn’t nearly as warm as he usually was, his skin chilled despite the suit he’d worn, and Dick wanted to wrap up around him, warm him up in anyway possible.

 

“I know it’s late,” Dick offered, as Slade let go of him, heading for the shower, “but I can make you coffee if you want. Or are you hungry? I could figure something out.”

 

Slade tugged open the shower door, reaching in the test the water, giving a little sigh of its heat. “What I’d like most,” he said, glancing back, “is for you to get in here with me.” Dick turned to face him fully, but Slade had already turned away. He hooked his fingers in his underwear, and Dick told himself to glance away, not to  _ stare _ \- but he was, as Slade pushed them down his thighs, stepped out of them and into the shower. He pulled the door shut, his frame distorted by the tined glass, but Dick still stared, watched the way his head tipped back as the water streamed over his shoulders and chest, had to rivet down his back.

 

He was tugging his tshirt over his head before he even realized he was moving. He tossed it away, shoved at his sweatpants, his briefs, leaving everything in a heap on the floor and heading for the shower. He grasped the door, tugged it open, took in Slade working his fingers through his long, now wet hair. The man glanced at him with his good eye, gave him a smirk.

 

“Pretty bird,” he mused, and Dick felt color on his cheeks, moving down his neck. He stepped in, sliding the door shut behind him, feeling the warm mist. The steam was rising, would fill their bathroom quickly. “Come here,” Slade said, hooking a wet arm around Dick’s waist, tugging him in. Dick moved against his body, sighing because Slade felt warm again. He pressed flush to his chest, the water pelting against his back in a steady stream, as Slade bent down, kissed his cheek.

 

It was still affectionate. More so than Dick was braced for. He reached up, clutched at Slade’s biceps, feeling a little dizzy. He told himself it was the rush of heat, the steam, and nothing more. But Slade’s mouth moved towards his ear, the arm around Dick tightening.

 

“God I missed you,” he mumbled, his other hand sliding along the curve of Dick’s waist, down to his hip. He nuzzled Dick’s now wet hair, and Dick gave a little whimper, pushing harder against Slade. When Slade lifted his head, Dick turned, kissed him properly. He trembled over it, shaking until he felt Slade smiling against his lips. “Easy,” he whispered, “I have you.”

 

He did and he shouldn’t and Dick couldn’t believe this was all  _ happening _ . He reached up, wound his arms around Slade’s neck and kissed him again, pressed his tongue into his mouth before Slade could say anything else damning. Before he could drive Dick’s heart straight up his throat. Dick slid against him, the water warming them both, making it  _ easy _ . Both Slade’s hands found their way to his scarred back, moving down the curve of it, before grasping at his ass. Dick gasped, and Slade jerked him against him, so Dick was grinding against him.

 

“Missed all of you,” Slade added, and  _ this _ , this was something Dick could work with. Sex started this, sex was something he understood and had accepted.

 

“Yeah?” Dick asked, unhooking one arm from around Slade’s neck. He reached between them, got his palm against the base of Slade’s cock, his own knuckles pushing against his pelvis, making him want to buck, to grind until he got a little friction exactly where he wanted it. His fingers slid lower, teased Slade’s balls as his half hard cock pressed against his palm and wrist. Slade groaned, eyelid fluttering shut, and Dick bit his lip. Carefully, he squirmed free of Slade’s hands, getting down on his knees and pressing his mouth low on his belly, feeling rivets of water as the shower spray hit Slade directly, sent water beading down him.

 

“Dick,” he breathed, daring to glance down, as Dick kissed slowly, following the crease of muscle from his hip towards his groin. Dick cradled Slade’s cock in one hand, the other settling down on his own thigh, fingers gently petting his own skin. He finally wrapped his hand around him, giving him a slow, firm stroke, loving the groan he got.

 

He pressed his mouth to the base, kissed his way slowly up his shaft. The hand on his own thigh slid higher, resting dangerously close to his own groin. He swirled his tongue around the head, before sucked it into his mouth. Slade groaned again, reached down, fingers working through Dick’s hair, pushing it back out of his face. Dick sighed, his hand slipping between his legs as he eased his mouth down Slade’s shaft, his fingers sliding past his own lips and pressing against his clit. He moaned, moving back up, fingers working himself as he bobbed his head.

 

Slade’s fingers never left his hair. They were tender as they stroked through it, before simply petting him. Dick whined, exhaling through his nose, taking Slade all the way down to the base. His tongue was pinned down, his throat stretching, but the way Slade groaned out his name was worth it. It made his belly go tight, made his fingers move desperately as a little ripple of pleasure radiated out through him.

 

He was easing back, when Slade’s hand moved from his hair to his chin, guided him all the way off his cock. Dick sucked in a deep breath, looked up with his rosy mouth open, as Slade’s thumb rubbed over his bottom lip.

 

“Come back up here,” he said, his voice gruff, husky from his chest. Dick forced his hand from between his legs, let Slade’s hands grip his forearms and pull him up. Slade leaned in, pecked his lips softly, let go of one of Dick’s arms as he reached between them, his fingers sliding between Dick’s legs. Dick gasped, squeezed his thighs together, trapping Slade’s fingers against his slick lips. “Sweetheart,” Slade breathed, and Dick mewled, tipped his head back into the water, couldn’t believe the way his body  _ wanted _ when Slade was affectionate.

 

He was never this… this…  _ loving _ .

 

Slade’s fingers managed to get between Dick’s folds, to tease his clit and slip back, feel how slick he was from sucking him off. Slade leaned in, kissed his mouth very gently, and Dick trembled, running his hands up Slade’s biceps. He squeezed, before Slade’s hand was leaving his cunt, and he was turning him, pushing him against the shower door. Dick mewled, wasn’t unused to this, this position, this predicament- and he lifted his ass, spreading his thighs and showing off his cunt.

 

The warm water was still spraying him, hitting his side now, letting water run down one leg, as Slade’s large hand clasped onto the curve of his waist, the other running up over his ass, the small of his back. Dick trembled waiting, wanting,  _ needing _ \- and then he felt the blunt head of Slade’s cock, rubbing along his folds, teasing. He sucked his breath in, closed his eyes- and let his mouth fall open in a happy moan as Slade very slowly eased into his body.

 

He nestled back against Slade’s pelvis, felt Slade leaning over him, pressing a kiss to his shoulder blade. His teeth scraped dark skin, before Slade was breathing out, “Missed you  _ so much _ .” Dick shivered, and he knew it wasn’t just the sex. Wasn’t just this physical aspect.

 

His fingers flexed along the shower door, and he was almost glad he wasn’t facing Slade, in that moment. Felt like he might break under him, might let his face convey just how much it was affecting him.

 

He inhaled, groaned with Slade’s thrust. It could just be sex, could be this casual companionship that Dick had been lying to himself about, since the beginning. After all- they  _ lived _ together. How could he think of it as anything short of serious? And he treated it as such, he was  _ faithful _ , and yet-

 

“ _ Dick _ .” His thoughts snapped at the sound of his name, and he let himself fall back into this, into his body. He was hot from the friction already, squirming because he didn’t feel Slade without a barrier very often- made him feel like he was being  _ bad _ and that only made him hotter. He bit at his lip, stifling a noise as he pushed back, felt his clit throbbing and wanting friction so badly.

 

Slade’s hand squeezed his waist, but the other reached out, covered Dick’s as it pressed to the door. Their fingers laced together, and Slade bowed over him, wet hair falling over his shoulders, tickling Dick’s back. Dick choked then, trembled and couldn’t deny it, that this was so much more,  _ so very much _ -

 

“Baby,” he mewled out, got a sharp thrust for it.

 

“ _ Little bird _ .” His thrusts were coming harder, and Dick dared to glance at their hands, at the perfect way their fingers fit together.

 

He whined, when Slade pulled out. But the way he bucked, rubbed against his pussy, his ass, it had Dick squirming. Dick gasped when Slade groaned out as he came, up onto the small of his back. He shivered, biting his lip again, feeling the shower water instantly washing away the mess.

 

And before he could even breathe, Slade was flipping him around, shoving his back up against the door. His hand came back, grasped Dick’s and pinned it, let their fingers tangle back together, as the other pressed between his legs. Slade’s fingers were quick to find his clit, to rub Dick in just the way he knew  _ Slade knew _ he needed. Dick trembled, opened his mouth to moan- but Slade kissed him, swallowed down the noise.

 

And he kept kissing him, sucked the breath from Dick’s lungs and the thought from his mind. Dick bucked, squeezed Slade’s fingers as the man’s tongue traced his lips, pushed at his own- and with a muffled whine, came  _ hard _ . He shook down to his core, whining as Slade’s fingers worked him through it, until he was hypersensitive and squirming. Slade pulled his hand away then, but instead of letting Dick free, reached for his other hand, tangled their fingers together there as well, and continued to kiss him.

 

And kiss him, as the warm water melted Dick down to utterly nothing.

 

*

 

Dick stared at the wall in the dark, fingers playing along the edge of the blanket. Behind him, against him, Slade was sleeping, a heavy arm draped protectively over Dick’s waist. His breathing was even, slow, familiar and comforting and  _ god _ , Dick had missed it so much, while he was gone. And the bed was definitely warmer, with him there. Much better than Dick wrapping himself up in countless blankets to fight the chill outside.

 

And yet…

 

Dick sighed, closed his eyes. He could still feel Slade’s fingers tangled with his, could hear him whispering how he missed him. Felt all the tender kisses he’d gotten through the rest of the shower, as they toweled off, dressed. Every little caress until they had crawled into bed.

 

And when had it  _ happened _ . It wasn’t overnight, Dick knew. Slade must have been like this too, before leaving. Maybe it hadn’t been quite so obvious, maybe DIck had grown used to it- but how did a few days without him make it seem so  _ sudden _ ?

 

Dick sighed, felt the hand resting near his belly splay over his bare abs. Slade rubbed slowly, as his mouth moved at Dick’s shoulder. “You’re still awake.” His voice was heavy, slow- and Dick knew he was barely awake himself. He had to be exhausted, after all.

 

“Don’t worry about it.” Dick reached for Slade’s hands, traced his fingers over his knuckles. “Go back to sleep baby.”

 

Slade hummed, before he was pulling back. He lifted up, turned Dick onto his back. Dick followed the motion, flopped there in the pillows, stared up as Slade covered one of his hands, kept it held firmly to the warm bed. He didn’t even need to ask, Dick knew he wanted whatever was inside his mind, wanted to know what kept him up thinking nonstop.

 

Dick bit his lip. He huffed out a breath, before whispering, “You’re sweet on me.”

 

Slade quirked up a brow, before he chuckled. He leaned down, pressed his lips to Dick’s forehead. “Yes, I suppose I am.”

 

Dick swallowed thickly. “But, have you  _ always _ been?” Slade lifted back up, and Dick glanced away. “I mean, you were… were you like this… before you left?” He huffed then, shaking his head. “Sorry, I sound ridiculous. Just… I don’t know. It hit me tonight.”

 

“What did?”

 

Dick had a feeling like Slade  _ knew _ , he just wanted to hear it. Dick turned his stare back to Slade, and in the dark, against one of Gotham’s coldest nights, whispered softly, “That maybe I love you.”

 

Dick lay there, feeling simultaneously lighter and yet weighed down, by Slade’s single eye. There was a long moment of silence, possibly the longest of Dick’s  _ life _ \- and then Slade was leaning back in, kissed Dick. Very slowly, very gently- like he was almost tentative, like Dick might break.

 

Dick felt his belly twitching, his chest feeling full and bursting, because it was so soft, so tender. He sighed, reached up with his free hand, carded his fingers back through Slade’s long hair. He tipped his head back, let the kiss deepen but remain slow- and when Slade pulled back, he pressed his forehead to Dick’s.

 

“Took you long enough, little bird,” he mumbled, and then, before Dick could speak, “I love you too.”

 

Dick lay there for a moment, before he felt his mouth curving into a grin. He hooked his arm around Slade’s neck, began laughing as he leaned up, kissed him again. The kiss was clumsy because Dick couldn’t stop laughing, but Slade was smiling into it. He rolled them onto their sides, got his arms around Dick, their legs tangled together, moved to kiss Dick’s jaw, his neck, as his laughter turned to giggles.

 

“You’re going to drive me crazy,” Dick admitted, and Slade kissed his pulse.

 

“Mm, am I? I thought you were meant to drive me crazy.” He squeezed Dick, holding him tightly, and Dick melted into it, settling happily into his arms. He tucked himself down under Slade’s chin, got a hand on his chest, fingers toying gently with his chest hair.

 

“You know,” Dick whispered, “love confessions at night in  _ bed _ usually lead to something else…” He rubbed his foot along Slade’s calf, smiled when the man chuckled. “And I wouldn’t mind being made love to.”

 

Slade tightened his arm around Dick, bent his head to kiss the top of his. “In the morning,” Slade mumbled. “How about that?”

 

Dick hummed. He could wait. And while he wasn’t kidding, it was rather nice to just… bask in this. To enjoy that Slade was warm and home, was wrapped around Dick like Dick swore he was always meant to be. And that  _ this _ , whatever it had once been, in the beginning- had morphed exactly into whatever Dick needed.

 

That this man was everything he should never be, to and for Dick, and that was  _ just fine _ .

  
  



End file.
